Some Sabbatical Reflections

Two thirds of my sabbatical are over with one third to go. Thus far it's been taken up with types work which I could not have completed were I in the saddle of active ministry. Ironically, I say 'thank you' for giving me the opportunity for such work. God made us to give ourselves to good, worshipful, redemptive work - so its quite appropriate that I am not resting the entire three months off. What kind of work have I done?

1. Work on my Doctor of Ministry degree. Last Friday I finished my last paper due for my July classes. Yeah!

2. Work around the house. Things like gardening. Cleaning out closets, drawers and over-stuffed files which one always thinks of doing but never has time to do. Seeking to be a daily help around the house to my dear wife.

3. Currently we're camped out on a friend's farm helping out with harvest. What a blessing to have time for that!

4. Spending three weeks dismantling, sanding, sawing, scraping, rebuilding and painting our fence. One never knows how large their fence is until such a task is necessary. One also never knows how offensive one's fence was to one's neighbors until they begin to stop by (many of them!) to comment on how happy they are with the new fence.

Let me make a further comment about our fence project. I was dreading it. I've undertaken enough house projects over the years to know that most take twice as long as anticipated. The fence was no exception. By mid-August visions of paint scrapings, rusty screws and the smell of latex paint were troubling my dreams. I never wanted to see another fence board again! But I did not hire out the job for one key reason: my son.

Carson (my 8 year old) has always been my right-hand 'man' with house projects, and earlier this summer, after spying a pair of kid-sized cowboy boots which were out of his price range, I agreed to pay him to help me with the fence. In the first week alone he logged more than thirty hours of scraping, sawing and screwing and had more than enough money for his boots. Therefore, he was glad to be working on the fence.

My epiphany of happiness came one dewy morning while we were scraping old fence boards together on the same pair of saw-horses. With white paint chips flying, we found ourselves talking about life - our dreams, failures, relationships, work and the gospel of God's grace. Unlike the regular Bible lessons Carson's experienced all his life during our evening meals and bed-time rituals, this context was different. As two 'men' working together, the sometimes artificial nature of parental discipleship was supplanted by something wonderfully natural - working together - which had a way of opening our hearts to each other to create the context for father-son discipleship God intends.

In a few weeks I'm going to begin a sermon series on Proverbs. My fence project with Carson taught me poignantly that the father to son instruction of that great book of the Bible isn't optimally executed from the pulpit, classroom or even dining room table. Godly wisdom from man to man is best imparted while working together. Ladies, you may do your discipleship best over tea, but for us men we'll take a saw, boards and some paint with our Bibles. I just think of the rich conversations I would have missed with my son had I hired out the job.

Competition to the Glory of God?

In his superb book, Respectable Sins, Jerry Bridges has a chapter called "Envy, Jealousy and Related Sins." Out of this chapter a section on competition emerges where he states:

"Let me clarify that I'm not writing against friendly competition but against the competitive spirit that always has to win or be the best. Actually, I believe that healthy competition is good, especially for children and high schoolers, as it can provide an arena in which they can seek to do their best. And this kind of competition is not limited to sports. There is competition at science fairs or among bands or at spelling bees. But in whatever competition, the question the child or teenager and their parents should ask is not 'Did we win?' but 'Did we do our best?'"

Sounds nice but let's be honest, when your son competes on the soccer field you want him to kick the game-winning goal, and when you enter your prize tomato or quilt at the fair, you want to take home the huge, purple ribbon. Right? Talk of 'doing our best' sounds nice, but down deep do we really believe that? Bridges goes on to write:

"Competitiveness is basically an expression of selfishness. It's the urge to win at someone else's expense. It is certainly not loving our neighbor as ourselves. I realize I'm questioning a 'sacred cow' in our culture, because we have elevated competitiveness to a virtue. We teach children directly or by example that it is good to be competitive, that this is the way one gets ahead in the world. I question, however, whether a competitive spirit is a Christian virtue." (pp. 153-155)

At the same time, in Romans 12:10, in an instance of profound irony, Paul seems to link love with competition when he writes, "Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor." Here God seems to command a holy competitiveness - but one limited to bearing the fruit of the Spirit toward the goal of blessing and serving others, rather than triumphing over them.

Your thoughts?

Our Desires Reveal Our God(s)

“The more a true saint loves God with a gracious love, the more he desires to love him, and the more uneasy is he at his want of love to him: the more he hates sin, the more he desires to hate it, and laments that he has so much remaining love to it: the more he mourns for sin, the more his heart is broke, the more he desires it should be broke: the more he thirsts and longs after God and holiness, the more he longs to long, and breathe out his very soul in longings after God: the kindling and raising of gracious affections is like kindling a flame; the higher it is raised, the more ardent it is; and the more it burns, the more vehemently does it tend and seek to burn.”

- Jonathan Edwards, Religious Affections in Works, Vol. I, p. 312.

A Jonathan Edwards Heart Check

“The Scripture knows of no such true Christians, as of a sordid, selfish, cross and contentious spirit. Nothing can be invented that is a greater absurdity, than a morose, hard, close, high-spirited, spiteful true Christian.”

- Jonathan Edwards, Religious Affections in Works, Vol. I, 307.

Fighting relational sin

At its core, sin is relational in nature. As a means of loving God, we want to love our spouses, our kids, our co-workers and others well, but before we know it, we've said or done something that wounds them all over again. What's the answer to our battle to love others well? Paul tells us in Galatians 5:16, "But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh."

Our daily battle to love others well by walking in the Spirit and not in the flesh is captured poignantly by John Michael Talbot in his beautiful song "Nature and Grace" - the words he uses to describe "Flesh and Spirit". Read his lyrics carefully as you think about how you've been talking to and treating the people in your life today.

Nature and Grace

Deep within me, there lies a true distinction
Between the things I would and what I really do.
I cannot believe I am so unusual.
Isn’t this the common sorrow within me and you?

Nature will seek only its own advantage.
It considers only how another might be used.
But grace will breed a new humility
To comfort those afflicted and to help those once abused.

Chorus: Nature might seek its fair consolation.
But it never offers its help without its price, without reward.
Grace finds reward in another’s consolation
Learning in this paradox the power of our Lord.

And nature will seek to be exalted in authority
To argue its opinion and have all the world conform.
But grace humbly comes in a silent assuredness
Speaking only to conform a man to his Lord.

TV

Randy Alcorn recently wrote about watching television on his blog. Below are some guidelines he has written to help in our discernment. You can read the explanations to each point HERE.

1. Keep track of how much time you spend watching.

2. Decide in advance how much TV to watch per week.

3. Use a schedule to choose programs for the week--then stick to your choices.

4. Keep your television unplugged, store it in a closet, and/or put it in a remote part of the house (prevents mindless flip-on).

5. Periodically "fast" from television for a week or a month. Notice the "cold turkey" effects. (Avoids addiction, reminds you of all that can be done when TV off).

6. Choose programs that uplift rather than undermine biblical values.

7. Use the "off" switch freely. If it's wrong and you keep watching, you're saying "I approve." (Unless it doesn't present temptation and you're critically analyzing it).

8. Use the channel changer frequently.

9. Watch and discuss programs together as a family--to avoid passivity and develop active moral discernment through interaction. (Avoid the second TV set that splits the family and leaves children unsupervised).

10. Don't allow young children to choose their own programs--that's the parent's responsibility.

11. Don't use television as a baby sitter.

12. Spend an hour reading Scripture, a Christian book or magazine, or doing a ministry for each hour you watch TV.

13. Consider dropping cable, Showtime, HBO, or any other service that you determine is importing ungodliness or temptation into your home.

14. If you find you can't control it--or you're tired of the battle--get rid of your television.

Sons & Daughters - Songs of Adoption

The fine musicians at Sovereign Grace Music have released a new album called Sons & Daughters.

The songs on this album are meant to direct our attention to the unfathomable love God has shown us in adopting us through Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:5). We are now part of God’s family - in Christ we will forever be the objects of God’s particular and passionate mercy and love. That biblical reality, rather than leaving us focused on ourselves, drives us once again to proclaim the greatness of the God whose grace turns hopeless rebels into the precious children.

“And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!” (Gal. 4:6)

Purchase the CD HERE ($12) or purchase an MP3 download of the album HERE ($9).

The Edwards' Lives Still Speak

I'm currently enjoyng George Marsden's wonderful biography on Jonathan Edwards. Chapter 20 includes a snapshot of parenting in the Edwards home. We can learn much from the following excerpts, not least the final one which underscores just how thankful we men should be for our godly wives:

The first impression a visitor would have upon arriving at the Edwards home was that there were a lot of children. The second impression would be that they were very well disciplined. Jonathan aided Sarah in disciplining the children from an early age. 'When they first discovered any considerable degree of will and stubbornness,' wrote biographer Samuel Hopkins, 'he would attend to them till he had thoroughly subdued them and brought them to submit with the greatest calmness, and commonly without striking a blow, effectively establishing his parental authority and producing a cheerful obedience ever after.

Care for his children's souls was his preeminent concern. In morning devotions he quizzed them on Scripture with questions appropriate to their ages. On Saturday evenings, the beginning of the Sabbath, he taught them the Westminster Shorter Catechism, making sure they understood as well as memorized the answers.

Edwards also believed in not holding back the terrors of hell from his children. 'As innocent as children seem to us,' he wrote, 'if they are out of Christ, they are not so in God's sight, but are young vipers....' At the judgment day unregenerate children would hardly thank their parents for sentimental tenderness that protected them from knowing the true dangers of their estate. Always looking for opportunities to awaken the young to their condition, he had taken the children to view the remains of the Lyman house fire that claimed two girls' lives.

By far the greater burden of childrearing fell to Sarah....On one occasion, when she was out of town in 1748, Jonathan was soon near his wits' end. Children of almost every age needed to be cared for. 'We have been without you,' Jonathan lamented in a letter, 'almost as long as we know how to be!'

- Jonathan Edwards: A Life by George Marsden, pp. 321-323

A Family is Blessed and a Baby is Healed

The following story is written by Daron Tienhaara. Daron and his wife Corrie are former members of Trinity Church and now attend Mars Hill Church in Olympia, Washington.

God is sovereign. We’ve heard this before, but do we really know what it means? And do we live like we believe it? I can say with complete certainty that the statement, “God is sovereign,” is 100% true and it’s not because He’s given me untold riches, vast lands, or unspeakable power. It’s because of what He’s shown my wife and I: He has the power to take away and at the same time the grace to say, “I will let you enjoy this gift for one more day.” (READ the entire story HERE)

Modesty Heart Check

This morning we looked at 1 Timothy 2:8-15. In this section Paul deals, in part, with modesty.

CLICK HERE to view the Modesty Heart Check that I mentioned. I would recommend this Heart Check for every woman at Trinity Church.

I would recommend that you print out the Heart Check (2 pages) and use it as a resource in the following ways,

Mothers - read it with your daughters.

Wives - read it with your husbands.

Fathers - read it with your wives and daughters.