Recently a friend sent me a news item about a male student at a Christian high school where the rules prohibit dancing and dance attendance. You can read about his dilemma here.
I'd like to see the entire rule first before giving him counsel on this. If it says something along the lines of "no dancing, no drinking, no card playing, etc...ever while you are enrolled as a student" then he has to abide by that covenant he signed. If it has no implications that he has to follow those rules outside of school, then, go for it buddy!
He's not disobeying his parents who seem to be for him going, he got the principal of his school to sign a permission slip, I don't know what else he can do.
I think suspending him from graduating is very overboard, but that's not the topic of discussion.
I agree that without actually seeing the rule (as Jason mentioned, does it cover all your actions while at school or not during your attendance?), it's hard to counsel him.
Honestly, what confuses me the most, though, is his principal's actions. Why on earth would the principal sign a permission slip if he was intending to take the issue to a disciplinary committee? This makes no sense to me.
I believe I would counsel the young man (Tyler)to ask questions of the principal. "Why are you permitting me to go to the prom when you don't believe I should go?" "Why will you discipline me after giving me permission?" I would counsel Tyler to talk through these issues with the principal in a way that is not undermining his authority but is seeking to understand it.
If the principal had given Tyler the same response he posted on the school web site, I would probably challenge his application of Scripture.
The principal says; "In the Old Testament, Joseph was in a place of temptation and he fled. Unlike this situation, he didn’t put himself in that place. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Keep your heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life.” II Timothy 2:22 says, “Flee also youthful lusts but follow after righteousness faith charity and peace with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” When the school committee, many years before I became the principal, set up the policy regarding dancing, I am confident that they had the principle of fleeing lustful situations in mind. The question as I see it is, should a Christian place themselves at an event where young ladies will have low cut dresses and be dancing in them? Isn’t it contrary to the example of Joseph and the verses that I stated?"
Is Tyler a believer? Does he have the Spirit? If he does, isn't this a matter of walking in the Spirit? How are we to flee all kinds of situations that MAY cause lust? Would the school advise Tyler not to go to the grocery store? What about the city pool? The mall? The fitness club? Where is the line? To flee all situations that may cause lust wouldn't we have to shut ourselves off from the world? This is the very thing we must consider as parents - how do we shepherd our believing children toward godliness without creating Pharisees?
I know that's not the question Andy asked but I believe it's part of it. Who is discipling this young man? Where is his father? What godly men are in his life? Is the principal discipling Tyler and helping him make wise decisions based on Scripture?
The thing I found most difficult to wrap my mind around (as some have posted above) is that the principal gave the kid permission to attend. That makes literally no sense.
Unless...
I know this is a looooooooong shot here but that's where my mind goes a lot of the time. God eventually gives habitual sinners over to their desires. We could ask the same I guess in that situation: Why would God sign that "permission slip" of sin?
Waaaaay out there, I know, but hey, that's just how I think...you know..."outside the bun".....I mean...box.....or something...
6 comments:
I'd like to see the entire rule first before giving him counsel on this. If it says something along the lines of "no dancing, no drinking, no card playing, etc...ever while you are enrolled as a student" then he has to abide by that covenant he signed. If it has no implications that he has to follow those rules outside of school, then, go for it buddy!
He's not disobeying his parents who seem to be for him going, he got the principal of his school to sign a permission slip, I don't know what else he can do.
I think suspending him from graduating is very overboard, but that's not the topic of discussion.
I agree that without actually seeing the rule (as Jason mentioned, does it cover all your actions while at school or not during your attendance?), it's hard to counsel him.
Honestly, what confuses me the most, though, is his principal's actions. Why on earth would the principal sign a permission slip if he was intending to take the issue to a disciplinary committee? This makes no sense to me.
I believe I would counsel the young man (Tyler)to ask questions of the principal. "Why are you permitting me to go to the prom when you don't believe I should go?" "Why will you discipline me after giving me permission?" I would counsel Tyler to talk through these issues with the principal in a way that is not undermining his authority but is seeking to understand it.
If the principal had given Tyler the same response he posted on the school web site, I would probably challenge his application of Scripture.
The principal says; "In the Old Testament, Joseph was in a place of temptation and he fled. Unlike this situation, he didn’t put himself in that place. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Keep your heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life.” II Timothy 2:22 says, “Flee also youthful lusts but follow after righteousness faith charity and peace with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” When the school committee, many years before I became the principal, set up the policy regarding dancing, I am confident that they had the principle of fleeing lustful situations in mind. The question as I see it is, should a Christian place themselves at an event where young ladies will have low cut dresses and be dancing in them? Isn’t it contrary to the example of Joseph and the verses that I stated?"
Is Tyler a believer? Does he have the Spirit? If he does, isn't this a matter of walking in the Spirit? How are we to flee all kinds of situations that MAY cause lust? Would the school advise Tyler not to go to the grocery store? What about the city pool? The mall? The fitness club? Where is the line? To flee all situations that may cause lust wouldn't we have to shut ourselves off from the world? This is the very thing we must consider as parents - how do we shepherd our believing children toward godliness without creating Pharisees?
I know that's not the question Andy asked but I believe it's part of it. Who is discipling this young man? Where is his father? What godly men are in his life? Is the principal discipling Tyler and helping him make wise decisions based on Scripture?
Sorry for the length.
The thing I found most difficult to wrap my mind around (as some have posted above) is that the principal gave the kid permission to attend. That makes literally no sense.
Unless...
I know this is a looooooooong shot here but that's where my mind goes a lot of the time. God eventually gives habitual sinners over to their desires. We could ask the same I guess in that situation: Why would God sign that "permission slip" of sin?
Waaaaay out there, I know, but hey, that's just how I think...you know..."outside the bun".....I mean...box.....or something...
Ken
An uh, I have absolutely NO idea why my posting name is showing up as "bob". I assure you, I am not bob. Will have to look into that.
Ken
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